Canada Kicks Ass
Canada apologises to the US

REPLY



GreatBriton @ Tue May 25, 2004 2:23 pm

A truly Canadian Apology to the USA, courtesy of Rick Mercer from This Hour Has 22 Minutes, CBC Television:

Hello. I'm Anthony St. George on location here in Washington.

On behalf of Canadians everywhere I'd like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well recently and for that, I am truly sorry. I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron, but it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on the people of America. After all, it's not like you actually elected him.

I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees than you, doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper and better than your own. It would be like if, well, say you had ten times the television audeince we did and you flood our market with great shows, cheaper than we could produce. I know you'd never do that.

I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defence I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours. As word of apology, please accept all of our NHL teams which, one by one, are going out of business and moving to your fine country.

I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up against a crazed dictator, you want to have your friends by your side. I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against Hitler, but that was different. Everyone knew he had weapons.

I'm sorry we burnt down your White House during the War of 1812. I see you've rebuilt it! It's very nice.

I'm sorry for Alan Thicke, Shania Twain, Celine Dion, Loverboy, that song from Seriff that ends with a really high-pitched long note. Your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer, but we feel your pain.

And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you're not upset over this. Because we've seen what you do to countries you get upset with.

For 22 minutes, I'm Anthony St. George, and I'm sorry.

   



Mattimer @ Tue May 25, 2004 2:25 pm

lmao thats great

   



AdamNF @ Tue May 25, 2004 3:13 pm

This was posted last week...funny though.

   



bc_bud @ Fri Jun 18, 2004 12:29 am

that heartfelt apology brought tears to my eyes.

   



Johnnybgoodaaaaa @ Fri Jun 18, 2004 12:59 am

I'm sorry we Americans don't really care...

   



-Mario- @ Fri Jun 18, 2004 2:57 am

I have seen this one a couple times in the past year... AND I still LMAO

-M-

   



figfarmer @ Fri Jun 18, 2004 6:08 am

tell them we're sorry we've used up all the "U"s so they have to spell so many words wrong. I hear they were even selling them used on Sesame Street for a while.

And most of all, I'd like to apologise for those fellows from Madoc who got confused and used the ewes. We all wear sheepish grins over that. It was baaaaaaaad.

   



Johnnybgoodaaaaa @ Fri Jun 18, 2004 10:04 am

I didn't even know that Canada beat the US in hockey, and I don't care. Most Americans don't really even care about that apology, or know about the things mentioned, or even know anything about Canada. I guess this apology is mainly only for true-blood Canadians, cause I don't find it funny, just kind of a pathetic attempt at humour by a jealous person....

   



bc_bud @ Fri Jun 18, 2004 10:10 am

Alright johnny. This thread is under jokes and humour! Take a joke. If you want to feel better about us kicking your ass in hockey (hahaha), just remember that the Tampa Bay won the stanley cup, and they deserved it.

   



Johnnybgoodaaaaa @ Fri Jun 18, 2004 10:19 am

Just because it's labeled a joke, doesn't mean everyone will find it funny. I don't really care that much, I just don't find it funny. I find it pathetic. I'm entitled to my opinion.

   



redneck_flyer @ Tue Aug 10, 2004 4:34 pm

The only reason tampa won is because it had more canadian on the team, but to be honest, my heart was for calgary going all the way.

   



HockeyBabe @ Wed Aug 18, 2004 12:50 pm

Johnnybgoodaaaaa Johnnybgoodaaaaa:
Just because it's labeled a joke, doesn't mean everyone will find it funny. I don't really care that much, I just don't find it funny. I find it pathetic. I'm entitled to my opinion.
Oh come on Johnny...don't try to ruin our fun, eh..It's cool if you wanna read it, but we don't really need your comments...if you really didn't care, then why the heck did you even bother posting that you don't care, eh? Laugh or leave... :lol:

   



mike2277 @ Wed Aug 18, 2004 12:56 pm

Johnnybgoodaaaaa Johnnybgoodaaaaa:
I'm sorry we Americans don't really care...


You spend an awful lot of time in the forums of a Canadian website for someone who doesn't care.

   



Ralph @ Wed Aug 18, 2004 1:00 pm

We know that you really like it
If not …..I’m SORRY...
:D

   



HockeyBabe @ Wed Aug 18, 2004 1:46 pm

Yeah...just gotta enjoy the jokes! Don't get all offensive!!! Like my favourite hockey team are the Leafs and I still laugh when I here a song making fun of them...it's all fun! don't get so offensive! by the way, Canadian beer is soooooooooo much better than American beer! NO DOOT ABOOT IT!!! :lol:

   



REPLY