The Official CANADAKA Fuck list!
Previous 1 ... 1627 1628 1629 1630 1631 1632 1633 ... 1691 Next
BartSimpson @ Thu Jan 16, 2020 10:15 am
DrCaleb DrCaleb:
BartSimpson BartSimpson:
Regardless of what happens I'm leaving at five.
That's my philosophy in my new role. Fuck it, there are no architectural emergencies.
We're still trying to recover our fucking SharePoint environment (which was already a massive clusterfuck) and thanks to law enforcement ordering us to block all non-USA traffic from our network edge we're now doing so.
The one fuckface from the C-suite who complained to me about it this morning I just now had her come over to the temporary office for the Fusion center team and she voiced her objections to blocking foreign traffic and she was promptly threatened with arrest.
Best fucking moment of my year so far!
![[B-o]](./images/smilies/drinkup.gif "Drink up")
stratos @ Thu Jan 16, 2020 10:22 am
Fuck it I almost always leave between 4-4:30 now. New guard has her shit together. We BS some times thus a later departure. I am not sitting at home going OMG I know idiot boy will call about something stupid. I still stay back sometimes to help the boss but even that turns into a sit around and BS session with a beer thrown in every now and then. Fuck I just remembered we're out of beer going to have to grab a case from a department that keeps some on hand
llama66 @ Fri Jan 17, 2020 9:58 am
I'd never fucking be able to afford you. I think the Guards get paid somewhere in the high teens per hour.
stratos @ Fri Jan 17, 2020 10:09 am
Yeah fuck that unless the cost of living is way lower than it is here in Austin
housewife @ Sun Jan 19, 2020 7:27 pm
Holy fuck they released him today. Of course after the lecture about having to get up and move he had a dizzy spell in the kitchen. Makes it really hard not to say sit down and I will get it. Tomorrow I’m taking him shoe shopping it’s a big store he will get his walk in haven’t told him yet. He so loves shopping I just know he will be thrilled 
Strutz @ Mon Jan 20, 2020 10:51 am
Robair Robair:
I'm giving up drinking for a month.
Wait, wait... fucking punctuation.
I'm giving up. Drinking for a month.
Wait, wait... fucking punctuation.
I'm giving up. Drinking for a month.
That's fucking funny!
Strutz @ Mon Jan 20, 2020 10:53 am
housewife housewife:
Holy fuck they released him today. Of course after the lecture about having to get up and move he had a dizzy spell in the kitchen. Makes it really hard not to say sit down and I will get it. Tomorrow I’m taking him shoe shopping it’s a big store he will get his walk in haven’t told him yet. He so loves shopping I just know he will be thrilled
Wow. They boot people out fucking quick after surgery. Good that he was deemed well enough to go home though. Hope his recovery goes well for both of you!
DrCaleb @ Mon Jan 20, 2020 12:12 pm
stratos stratos:
Fucking paranoid, brain burned out by drugs, comes in and wants to … fucken hell dude shut up the Gov. is not after you and they will not get your POS story you think is ground breaking before a reporter looks over it.
I love those people! "Shhhh! Not here! They are listening."
stratos stratos:
Hey llama66 you all hiring, pay for me to move up there, how much per fucking hour will I get.
Just a warning, 40 below or 6 feet of snow. That's all winter is offering this fucking year.
stratos @ Mon Jan 20, 2020 1:09 pm
$1:
Just a warning, 40 below or 6 feet of snow. That's all winter is offering this fucking year.
So back like when I was growing up.
DrCaleb @ Mon Jan 20, 2020 1:14 pm
Lies! You didn't fucking grow up.
stratos @ Mon Jan 20, 2020 1:40 pm
Well fuck mentally I didn't, physically I did.
raydan @ Wed Jan 22, 2020 9:20 pm
Report: 90% of people need to fuck off
$1:
Scientists are reporting that more people than ever before need to fuck off, which almost certainly includes you.
The number of people who desperately need to fuck off has tripled from 30% to 90% in the space of ten years.
‘This is an absolute global crisis,’ said Dr Simon Sais. ‘These people need to fuck off now or the whole world is doomed.’
When Dr Sais was asked how people should fuck off, he could only respond ‘Preferably, very quickly.’
No-one is quite sure how the number of people who need to fuck off has risen so drastically, although everyone accepts that it’s true.
‘Nearly every time I meet someone I think “They need to fuck right off”. 90% might be a conservative estimate,’ said one man on the street.
The number of people who desperately need to fuck off has tripled from 30% to 90% in the space of ten years.
‘This is an absolute global crisis,’ said Dr Simon Sais. ‘These people need to fuck off now or the whole world is doomed.’
When Dr Sais was asked how people should fuck off, he could only respond ‘Preferably, very quickly.’
No-one is quite sure how the number of people who need to fuck off has risen so drastically, although everyone accepts that it’s true.
‘Nearly every time I meet someone I think “They need to fuck right off”. 90% might be a conservative estimate,’ said one man on the street.
https://www.dailysquat.com/report-90-of ... o-fuck-off
xerxes @ Wed Jan 22, 2020 10:01 pm
Fairly certain I fucked myself out of my job today. I was being lazy and did something dumb. The boss saw it and sent me home. FML
Think I’ll start working on my fucking resume now. Which I hate doing. I’m always so self critical when I do. Like what are my skills? I dunno. Existing?!
Strutz @ Wed Jan 22, 2020 10:41 pm
$1:
St. John’s residents give up shovelling, build a new city on top of the old one
Early reports indicate that residents of St. John’s, Newfoundland have given up removing snow from roads, sidewalks, and roofs, and have started building a new provincial capital.
All 114,000 residents said “fuck this” when confronted with 10 foot snow mounds and immediately started constructing new homes, businesses, and governments on the snow-covered foundation on what was a city.
“We must rebuild,” announced St. John’s Mayor Danny Breen from his snow cave. “ My back is already sore and I don’t want to keep shovelling.”
Stalwart citizens have already constructed and painted a snow fort version of Jellybean Row, which has already attracted dozens of tourists.
“This much easier than suffering a heart attack while plowing all of this white shit off of my driveway,” said an exhausted Michael Murphy who gave up after the first attempt. “I’ll get to work on designing the new ice sewage system.”
According to sources, stubborn Newfoundlanders refused to accept the army’s help to dig out since they take pride in “not being Toronto.”
Early reports indicate that residents of St. John’s, Newfoundland have given up removing snow from roads, sidewalks, and roofs, and have started building a new provincial capital.
All 114,000 residents said “fuck this” when confronted with 10 foot snow mounds and immediately started constructing new homes, businesses, and governments on the snow-covered foundation on what was a city.
“We must rebuild,” announced St. John’s Mayor Danny Breen from his snow cave. “ My back is already sore and I don’t want to keep shovelling.”
Stalwart citizens have already constructed and painted a snow fort version of Jellybean Row, which has already attracted dozens of tourists.
“This much easier than suffering a heart attack while plowing all of this white shit off of my driveway,” said an exhausted Michael Murphy who gave up after the first attempt. “I’ll get to work on designing the new ice sewage system.”
According to sources, stubborn Newfoundlanders refused to accept the army’s help to dig out since they take pride in “not being Toronto.”
https://www.thebeaverton.com/2020/01/st ... e-old-one/
Strutz @ Wed Jan 22, 2020 10:44 pm
xerxes xerxes:
Fairly certain I fucked myself out of my job today. I was being lazy and did something dumb. The boss saw it and sent me home. FML
Think I’ll start working on my fucking resume now. Which I hate doing. I’m always so self critical when I do. Like what are my skills? I dunno. Existing?!
Think I’ll start working on my fucking resume now. Which I hate doing. I’m always so self critical when I do. Like what are my skills? I dunno. Existing?!
Well that fucking sucks.
Didn't you say something about maybe applying for a management position at the same company last year?
Previous 1 ... 1627 1628 1629 1630 1631 1632 1633 ... 1691 Next