The Sun.


Don't let women ruin your World Cup viewing.

Internet pranksters have dreamed up a set of rules for blokes to give to their partners during the World Cup. Sorry girls, but we couldn't help ourselves - so nip down to the shop for supplies, pass us a beer, and stick to this guide when the World Cup starts -

1) Read the sports section of The Sun everyday during the World Cup so you can join in the only conversations I'll be holding. Failure to comply will lead to you being totally ignored.

2) During the World Cup, the television is mine at all times. Even glancing at the remote control will be considered an act of trespass.

3) If you have to pass in front of the TV during a game, please crawl on the floor without distracting me.

4) During games I will be blind, deaf and mute to all conversation unless I require more booze or nibbles.

5) Keep at least 2 six-packs of lager and nibbles in the fridge at all times. In return, you will be allowed to use the TV between 12am and 6am (except during replays).

6) If you see me upset because my team is losing, do not say "It's only a game" because I will love you less. You will NEVER know more about football than me and your so-called words of encouragement could spark a divorce.

7) You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and talk to me during the half-time ad-breaks providing I am happy with the score.

8 ) The replays of the goals are very important. I don't care if I have seen them or if I haven't seen them, I want to see them again. Again and again.

9) Tell your friends NOT to bring any babies to the house or hold child-related events because I will not go.

10) If a friend of mine invites us to his house on a Sunday to watch a key match, we will accept immediately.

11) The World Cup highlights on TV every night is equally as important as the live games themselves. Do NOT say "But you have already seen this....why don't you change the channel to something we can all watch?"

12) Avoid comments such as "Thank God the World Cup is only every four years." I am immune to these words, because after this come the Premiership and Champions League.

thesun.co.uk

   

I am so happy I know more about football than my bf right now.