How's that Global Warming working out for you?
BartSimpson @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 9:52 am
The UK Daily Mail yesterday announced that the UK Army is being called up to deal with clearing snow and ice on the roads in the UK's coldest December in 100 years.
The Klimate Klowns in KanKun are also dealing with a record cold snap as they prattle on about global warming.
The Telegraph has a funny one today:
$1:
Signs that show Man Made Global Warming is Definitely Still Happening
As your boiler breaks down, your pipes freeze, your car won’t start, your Ocado delivery fails to arrive, your train is cancelled, your neck is broken after slipping on black ice and you lie in an emergency ward waiting for a doctor to turn up only to learn that they’re all off today because of the weather, you might be forgiven for thinking that all this has something to do with global cooling, changes in the Pacific Decadal Oscillation, and the decline in sunspot activity perhaps auguring a new Maunder minimum.
But you couldn’t be more wrong.
“It’s all actually a sign that man made global warming is very much a live issue and that there’s more of it happening than ever,” says a top scientist, who holds the British record for securing grant-funding for global warming research projects so he must know what he’s talking about.
“Look at the Met office,” the scientist goes on. “They’ve just told us that 2010 is the hottest year since records began in 1850 and even though the stupid Central England Temperature record tells us something quite different and even though the year hasn’t actually finished yet they must know what they’re talking about and they definitely can’t have fiddled the data because the Met office is part of the government and they wouldn’t lie or get things wrong which is why that barbecue summer was such a scorcher.”
The big problem is, the scientist said, is that the public are really stupid. They think just because Dr David Viner of the Climatic Research Unit said in the Independent in 2000 that soon there’d be no snow because of global warming, when what he actually meant was that soon there’d be lots of snow and that this would be “proof” of global warming. The interviewer just missed out the word “proof” that’s all because journalists are lazy that way.
Then the scientist issued a cut-out-and-keep guide of Signs That Show Man Made Global Warming Is Definitely Still Happening And That Cancun Won’t Be An Almighty Flop.
1. Warm weather
2. Cold weather
3. In-between weather.
4. Dark skies at night
5. Light skies in the morning
6. An unpleasant moist/damp/wet sensation when it rains
7. Ice appearing when the temperature drops below zero
8. Clouds rolling across sky in all sorts of funny shapes, some days like cotton wool, other days in streaks, and on some days not there at all.
9. Ursine subarboreal toilet activity (bears pooping in the woods)
10. Strong new evidence of ultramontane sympathies at the Vatican
Tags: it's real - no really, man-made global warming
As your boiler breaks down, your pipes freeze, your car won’t start, your Ocado delivery fails to arrive, your train is cancelled, your neck is broken after slipping on black ice and you lie in an emergency ward waiting for a doctor to turn up only to learn that they’re all off today because of the weather, you might be forgiven for thinking that all this has something to do with global cooling, changes in the Pacific Decadal Oscillation, and the decline in sunspot activity perhaps auguring a new Maunder minimum.
But you couldn’t be more wrong.
“It’s all actually a sign that man made global warming is very much a live issue and that there’s more of it happening than ever,” says a top scientist, who holds the British record for securing grant-funding for global warming research projects so he must know what he’s talking about.
“Look at the Met office,” the scientist goes on. “They’ve just told us that 2010 is the hottest year since records began in 1850 and even though the stupid Central England Temperature record tells us something quite different and even though the year hasn’t actually finished yet they must know what they’re talking about and they definitely can’t have fiddled the data because the Met office is part of the government and they wouldn’t lie or get things wrong which is why that barbecue summer was such a scorcher.”
The big problem is, the scientist said, is that the public are really stupid. They think just because Dr David Viner of the Climatic Research Unit said in the Independent in 2000 that soon there’d be no snow because of global warming, when what he actually meant was that soon there’d be lots of snow and that this would be “proof” of global warming. The interviewer just missed out the word “proof” that’s all because journalists are lazy that way.
Then the scientist issued a cut-out-and-keep guide of Signs That Show Man Made Global Warming Is Definitely Still Happening And That Cancun Won’t Be An Almighty Flop.
1. Warm weather
2. Cold weather
3. In-between weather.
4. Dark skies at night
5. Light skies in the morning
6. An unpleasant moist/damp/wet sensation when it rains
7. Ice appearing when the temperature drops below zero
8. Clouds rolling across sky in all sorts of funny shapes, some days like cotton wool, other days in streaks, and on some days not there at all.
9. Ursine subarboreal toilet activity (bears pooping in the woods)
10. Strong new evidence of ultramontane sympathies at the Vatican
Tags: it's real - no really, man-made global warming
Brenda @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 9:57 am
BartSimpson @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 10:04 am
Another sign that catastrophic warming is taking place:
"The River Ouse in the centre of York was iced over for the first time in 50 years yesterday"
Zipperfish @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 10:06 am
Ah, the moving goalposts of the skeptics. Just a few days ago, you admitted that there was a warming trend, and now we're back to "It's cold today therefore global warming is a pile of crap."
Proculation @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 10:12 am
yeah that's quite ironic that when they are doing a meeting, there's colder than normal weather. It happened in Copenhagen too. Maybe God is not happy about those false prophets.
EyeBrock @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 10:20 am
I thought the GW crowd were now supporting Wikileaks? They got bored with Al.
Lemmy @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 10:31 am
sandorski @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 10:50 am
Zipperfish Zipperfish:
Ah, the moving goalposts of the skeptics. Just a few days ago, you admitted that there was a warming trend, and now we're back to "It's cold today therefore global warming is a pile of crap."
Indeed. Fail, again, for X Years running.
Brenda @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 10:54 am
Zipperfish Zipperfish:
Ah, the moving goalposts of the skeptics. Just a few days ago, you admitted that there was a warming trend, and now we're back to "It's cold today therefore global warming is a pile of crap."
Just to make clear where I stand... (if anybody is interested, that is
)Yes, I think the earth is warming. No, I don't necessarily think that that is mankinds fault. I think we are at the end of an iceage, so of course we are warming. And in a "few" years, we will be cooling again.
Our existence is just a blip, a nothing, on Earth. I am not arrogant enough to think that we, and all our technology, can ruin something that has been existing for millions of years.
BartSimpson @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 11:11 am
Zipperfish Zipperfish:
Ah, the moving goalposts of the skeptics.
An overall, 20,000 year long warming trend is one thing.
An assertion of a 100% man-made, 'catastrophic' and civilization-ending rapid warming is another.
Your side has asserted the man-made, short term, rapid warming, not mine.
Besides, I'm just discussing the facts of the weather. Or do you think that the stories about record cold are just eeebil plots by skeptics?
bootlegga @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 11:15 am
Oh my god! It's cool/cold in December!
Forget writing, electricity, the computer, the airplane, space flight - I think Bart has stumbled upon the greatest discovery in mankind's history!
I guess I'll wait for your inevitable posts next summer that it gets hot in July!
[/sarcasm off]
BartSimpson @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 11:20 am
bootlegga bootlegga:
Oh my god! It's cool/cold in December!
Forget writing, electricity, the computer, the airplane, space flight - I think Bart has stumbled upon the greatest discovery in mankind's history!
I guess I'll wait for your inevitable posts next summer that it gets hot in July!
[/sarcasm off]
Forget writing, electricity, the computer, the airplane, space flight - I think Bart has stumbled upon the greatest discovery in mankind's history!
I guess I'll wait for your inevitable posts next summer that it gets hot in July!
[/sarcasm off]
I see.
When it's "record warm" you have no problem with that.
How about this:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/pers ... icted.html
$1:
An estimated 8 million consumers will be hit by higher energy bills today, as the Met Office predicts Britain could be on course for the coldest winter in a century.
That would be the same Met Office that has been pushing AGW theory. I'll at least give them credit for not denying what millions of Brits are clearly observing right now.
bootlegga @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 11:34 am
Well, based on your rather amateurish theory that "because it's cold today in Bumfuck, Iowa, global warming is bullshit", I'll counter with "because Edmonton had record warm temperatures in November, it isn't".
Global warming/climate change is based on global temperatures over the course of the entire year, not based on anomalies (extreme hold OR cold) in one location or another.
And based on everything I've seen/read/heard, temperatures are rising globally.
The only question is whether or not mankind has anything to do with it.
Based on the rise in temperatures right about the time mankind began to industrialize, I would guess we have had some impact. The only question in my mind is how much - .5%, 1%, 5%, 10%, 25%, whatever. I think our impact is relatively small, but even a 10% increase in temperature due to our continued use of fossil fuels is too much - as it will further stress places already facing drought/famine issues.
I don't advocate going back to the Stone age and banning fossil fuels by any stretch of the imagination, but I would like to see governments introduce more legislation that provides incentives for companies (auto companies, manufacturers, etc) to reduce the amount of CO2 they and they products produce.
I'm not at all in favour of 'green/carbon taxes' but would prefer people be coaxed into more fuel efficient vehicles/furnaces/houses/etc by companies/governments offering grants/rebates. If gas prices rise again after the recession ends, people will begin to shift their lifestyles to deal with increased prices as they did when oil hit $147/barrel.
I would hope by 2050 we will be well on our way to the transition to a hydrogen/fusion/whatever economy, instead of one run almost entirely by hydrocarbons.
Canadaka @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 11:36 am
again why do people fail to release the "global" part of global warming. Doesn't mean there can't be record lows in places or some places might be cooler. The warming is a global average of air and sea temperature, from what I understand.
andyt @ Fri Dec 10, 2010 11:38 am
This is further proof of global warming. One of the effects is thought to be the shutting down of the Gulf stream, resulting in lower temps in Europe. And here it is. We're doomed.